This week has been the tits.
I started playing drums this week and had more fun messing around on the drums than I did with years of playing bass. I've hit up in n out about three times, rubios and red robin once and Arek's house every day so far. That being mentioned:
Top 3 Names for my Firstborn Son:
1. Arek
2. Ender
3. Seth
Also, I can't wait until I am at some fancy business breakfast meeting when I have a job and after everyone around me orders coffee, and then I go and order a wild cherry pepsi. It's gonna be sick
Friday, March 28, 2008
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Questions that Keep Me up at Night
1. If you had 50 penises (peni) growing from you body in a ridiculous fashion, would you die of a stroke type ailment upon arousal?
2. What is more terrifying, rage zombies or velociraptors?
3. How horrible would it be to be a recovering physic amnesiac beginning to remember the past while having flashes of the future?
4. Is there an parallel universe where beards make you less manly?
5. How many more nights will I look for spray paint in mailboxes before I start looking for gnomes in cookies jars in my padded cell?
2. What is more terrifying, rage zombies or velociraptors?
3. How horrible would it be to be a recovering physic amnesiac beginning to remember the past while having flashes of the future?
4. Is there an parallel universe where beards make you less manly?
5. How many more nights will I look for spray paint in mailboxes before I start looking for gnomes in cookies jars in my padded cell?
Monday, November 5, 2007
Today
Is a glorious day.
Remember remember the 5th of November.
I now know of one more reason why it will never be forgot.
Remember remember the 5th of November.
I now know of one more reason why it will never be forgot.
Monday, October 15, 2007
I'm Not Myself
I have been thinking a lot about who I am lately and what it really means to have an identity and I thought I would share with you, my reader(s), what conclusions I have drawn.
I shall start with a connected idea. Let's say you have an old wooden ship that you love very much. You love it so much in fact, that once a plank gets rotted and old, you just replace the singular plank rather than buying a whole new boat (this is back in the day when it was cheaper to repair something than buy a new one entirely). So time moves along at its standard pace until lo and behold, you have to replace another plank of wood on your ship. This pattern continues along you eventually have replaced every single plank of wood on your ship. We now have to ask the question: is it still the same ship? If so, why? It has lost every bit of it's original matter that once held it together. It has no mystical soul that keeps it together, or any other measurable force that really defines this as the same ship as before, other than the fact that you love it of course. Now, if it is not the same ship: when did it become a new ship? Was it around the time it was half old/half new? Once you lost the last plank? One you replaced the first one? There isn't really an easy answer, for me at least.
Anyway, I drew a parallel to myself. A good percentage of the matter in my body get recycled, lost and renewed very frequently. Sure, there are some atoms and cells in my brains and bones that never leave me, but I don't really think those cells really define me. So perhaps I am defined by some sort of self that is detached from my physical body. However, with the lack of a soul or spirit, the only other part of me that is really me is the set of my ideas and beliefs. Maybe then, my ideas and my beliefs define me. Unfortunately, those aren't static in the least bit. My ideas and beliefs change fairly frequently when you look at my life on the whole. How am I the same person I was 5 years ago? How am I the same person I will be in 10 years?
The answer I have arrived at: I'm not. I know this may seem trivial, but I really don't believe I am the same person one day to the next. I am in a constant state of death, and in a constant state of rebirth. The guy I was yesterday is gone forever. I don't identity with the screaming infant I was when I left the womb, or the naked child running around the back yard, and I certainly don't feel like I am the same person and some decrepit arthritic man that will have my name.
So I can't manage to believe in a Heaven that makes any sense. I am a different person from one minute to the next. There is no way for 8 year old Sam to go to Heaven; he is dead forever. Even if there is a Heaven, and I am admitted, it most likely won't be until I am quite old. This person writing these words will soon be dead forever (if not already). I can never preserve who I am. It's because of this idea that I don't find the idea of a blissful everlasting comforting at all. I am already dead. Once I die and stop being reborn forever (aka my final death, the death of this strange collection of matter I call myself), I will be no more or less dead than the guy who started writing this blog.
I shall start with a connected idea. Let's say you have an old wooden ship that you love very much. You love it so much in fact, that once a plank gets rotted and old, you just replace the singular plank rather than buying a whole new boat (this is back in the day when it was cheaper to repair something than buy a new one entirely). So time moves along at its standard pace until lo and behold, you have to replace another plank of wood on your ship. This pattern continues along you eventually have replaced every single plank of wood on your ship. We now have to ask the question: is it still the same ship? If so, why? It has lost every bit of it's original matter that once held it together. It has no mystical soul that keeps it together, or any other measurable force that really defines this as the same ship as before, other than the fact that you love it of course. Now, if it is not the same ship: when did it become a new ship? Was it around the time it was half old/half new? Once you lost the last plank? One you replaced the first one? There isn't really an easy answer, for me at least.
Anyway, I drew a parallel to myself. A good percentage of the matter in my body get recycled, lost and renewed very frequently. Sure, there are some atoms and cells in my brains and bones that never leave me, but I don't really think those cells really define me. So perhaps I am defined by some sort of self that is detached from my physical body. However, with the lack of a soul or spirit, the only other part of me that is really me is the set of my ideas and beliefs. Maybe then, my ideas and my beliefs define me. Unfortunately, those aren't static in the least bit. My ideas and beliefs change fairly frequently when you look at my life on the whole. How am I the same person I was 5 years ago? How am I the same person I will be in 10 years?
The answer I have arrived at: I'm not. I know this may seem trivial, but I really don't believe I am the same person one day to the next. I am in a constant state of death, and in a constant state of rebirth. The guy I was yesterday is gone forever. I don't identity with the screaming infant I was when I left the womb, or the naked child running around the back yard, and I certainly don't feel like I am the same person and some decrepit arthritic man that will have my name.
So I can't manage to believe in a Heaven that makes any sense. I am a different person from one minute to the next. There is no way for 8 year old Sam to go to Heaven; he is dead forever. Even if there is a Heaven, and I am admitted, it most likely won't be until I am quite old. This person writing these words will soon be dead forever (if not already). I can never preserve who I am. It's because of this idea that I don't find the idea of a blissful everlasting comforting at all. I am already dead. Once I die and stop being reborn forever (aka my final death, the death of this strange collection of matter I call myself), I will be no more or less dead than the guy who started writing this blog.
Monday, October 8, 2007
Bye Bye Buying Blue Jeans
So I hopped skipped and jumped to my local mall in the very recent past with a very simple purpose in mind. Even among all the troubles of life and the thoughts that race through my head in any given instant on a regular day, at this point I only had one thought.
"I want a new pair of blue jeans."
Now I reckoned to myself, quite foolishly I might add, that such a quest would be relatively easy and short lived. How wrong I was in my naivety and innocence. As it would turn out, stores refuse to sell standard blue jeans. I went to Old Navy first, thinking they would have standard items. Sadly, they only sell faded/torn/boot cut jeans. There wasn't even anything that was a regular blue. I then went to Tilly's, but only because of my brother's request. I was unsurprised there to find nothing remotely close to what I wanted. Again I was faced with ridiculous non-blue colors and jeans so baggy they might of well have been parachute pants.
My savior was a store I rarely venture into: Sears. Not only did I find exactly what I wanted, but they were only 20 bucks. Talk about a deal. No one wants normal pants anymore, so they are cheap as all Hell. I feel like Michael from the Office in these. Or maybe a gunslinger.
Moral of the story: traditional blue jeans are badass.
"I want a new pair of blue jeans."
Now I reckoned to myself, quite foolishly I might add, that such a quest would be relatively easy and short lived. How wrong I was in my naivety and innocence. As it would turn out, stores refuse to sell standard blue jeans. I went to Old Navy first, thinking they would have standard items. Sadly, they only sell faded/torn/boot cut jeans. There wasn't even anything that was a regular blue. I then went to Tilly's, but only because of my brother's request. I was unsurprised there to find nothing remotely close to what I wanted. Again I was faced with ridiculous non-blue colors and jeans so baggy they might of well have been parachute pants.
My savior was a store I rarely venture into: Sears. Not only did I find exactly what I wanted, but they were only 20 bucks. Talk about a deal. No one wants normal pants anymore, so they are cheap as all Hell. I feel like Michael from the Office in these. Or maybe a gunslinger.
Moral of the story: traditional blue jeans are badass.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Songs on Repeat
I don't think I have ever met a person in my lifetime who loves to listen to a song on repeat as much as I do. I've listened to songs 40 times in a day before. As I type I am listening to Black Electric for at least the 15th time tonight. It takes me an obscenely long time to get sick of a song. And once I get hooked on a song, it's near impossible for me to tear myself away from it. Red Handed by the Dear Hunter had me in its grasps quite tightly recently as well.
Hark! Alas o wench, masticating anon.
That was my transition sentence by the way, in case you hadn't picked up on that. I am immensely busy nowadays. It seems like if I'm not going to class or going to work I am trying to stay on top of my homework being assigned in every class. I think occasionally I have enough time to sleep...Ah, who am I kidding, I never get less than 9 hours a night. Sleep is like crack to me. I love sleeping bags. I actually choose to sleep in one now. I have sheets neatly folded near my bed, but my sleeping bag gets all the love. Speaking of sleep..
Hark! Alas o wench, masticating anon.
That was my transition sentence by the way, in case you hadn't picked up on that. I am immensely busy nowadays. It seems like if I'm not going to class or going to work I am trying to stay on top of my homework being assigned in every class. I think occasionally I have enough time to sleep...Ah, who am I kidding, I never get less than 9 hours a night. Sleep is like crack to me. I love sleeping bags. I actually choose to sleep in one now. I have sheets neatly folded near my bed, but my sleeping bag gets all the love. Speaking of sleep..
Saturday, October 6, 2007
Highlights from the Book of Everyone's Favorite Lucifer
Satanism does advocate sexual freedom, but only in the true sense of the word. Free love, in the Satanic concept, means exactly that – freedom to either be faithful to one person to or indulge your sexual desires with as many others as you feel is necessary to satisfy your particular needs.
Satanism condones any type of sexual activity which properly satisfies your individual desires – be it heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, or even asexual, if you choose. Satanism also sanctions any fetish or deviation which will enhance your sex life, so long as it involves no one who does not wish to be involved.
You cannot love everyone; it is ridiculous to think you can. If anything is used too freely it loses its true meaning. Therefore, the Satanist believes you should love strongly and completely those who deserve your love, but never turn the other cheek to your enemy.
Repressed hatred can lead to many physical and emotional ailments. By learning to release your hatred towards those who deserve it, you cleanse yourself of these malignant emotions and need not take your pent-up hatred out on your loved ones.
Satan represents vital existence, instead of spiritual pipe dreams.
Life is the greatest indulgence – death, the greatest abstinence. Therefore, make the most of life, here and now!
There is no heaven of glory bright, and no hell where sinners roast. Here and now is our day of torment! Here and now is our day of joy!
Anyone who thinks of Satan as evil should consider all the men, women, children, and animals who have died because it was “God’s will.�? Certainly a person grieving the untimely loss of a loved one would much rather have their loved one with them than in God’s hands! Instead, they are unctuously consoled by their clergyman who says, “It was God’s will, my dear�?; or “He is in God’s hands now, my son.�? Such phrases have been a convenient way for religionists to condone or excuse the mercilessness of God. But if God is in complete control and as benign as he is supposed to be, why does He allow these things to happen?
Pious prophets have taught man to fear Satan. But what of terms like “God fearing�?? If God is so merciful, why do people have to fear him? Are we to believe there is nowhere we can turn to escape fear? If you have to fear God, why not be “Satan fearing�? and at least have the fun that being God fearing denies you? Without such wholesale fear religionists would have had nothing with which to wield power of their followers.
The Satanist, realizing that anything he gets is of his own doing, takes command of the situation instead of praying to God for it to happen. Positive thinking and positive action add up to results.
When a Satanist commits a wrong, he realizes that it is natural to make a mistake – and if he is truly sorry about what he has done, he will learn from it and take care not to do the same thing again. If he is not honestly sorry about what he has done, and knows he will do that same thing over and over, he has no business confessing and asking forgiveness in the first place. But this is exactly what happens. People confess their sins so that they may clear their consciences – and be free to go out and sin again, usually the same sin.
God can do all the things man is forbidden to do – such as kill people, perform miracles to gratify his will, control without apparent responsibility, etc.
Satanism advocates practicing a modified form of the Golden Rule. Our interpretation of this rule is: “Do unto others as they do unto you�?; because if you “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,�? and they, in turn, treat you badly, it goes against human nature to continue to treat them with consideration. You should do unto others as you would have them do unto you, but if your courtesy is not returned, they should be treated with the wrath they deserve.
The Roman god, Lucifer, was the bearer of light, the spirit of the air, the personification of enlightenment.
Satanism encourages any form of sexual expression you may desire, so long as it hurts no one else.
No matter what you’ve been told about the “immaculate conception�? – even if blind faith allows you to swallow this absurdity – you know full well if you are to produce a child, there must be sexual contact with a person of the opposite sex! If you feel guilty for committing the “original sin,�? you certainly will feel even deeper guilt for performing a sex act only for self-gratification, with no intention of creating children.
The Satanist fully realizes why religionists declare masturbation to be sinful. Like all other natural acts people will do it, no matter how severely reprimanded. Causing guilt is an important facet of their malicious scheme to obligate people to atone for “sins�? by paying the mortgages on temples of abstinence!
Every fund raising organization, be it a charitable foundation, community council, religious or fraternal association, etc., carefully selects a person who is adept at making others feel guilty for its chairman or coordinator. It is the job of this chairman to intimidate us into opening first our hearts, and then our wallets.
Religionists have kept their followers in line by suppressing their egos. By making their followers feel inferior, the awesomeness of their god is insured. Satanism encourages its members to develop a good strong ego because it gives them the self respect necessary for a vital existence in this life.
The highest of all holidays in the Satanic religion is the date of one’s own birth. After all, aren’t you happier about the fact that you were born than you are about the birth of someone you have never even met?
Satanism condones any type of sexual activity which properly satisfies your individual desires – be it heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, or even asexual, if you choose. Satanism also sanctions any fetish or deviation which will enhance your sex life, so long as it involves no one who does not wish to be involved.
You cannot love everyone; it is ridiculous to think you can. If anything is used too freely it loses its true meaning. Therefore, the Satanist believes you should love strongly and completely those who deserve your love, but never turn the other cheek to your enemy.
Repressed hatred can lead to many physical and emotional ailments. By learning to release your hatred towards those who deserve it, you cleanse yourself of these malignant emotions and need not take your pent-up hatred out on your loved ones.
Satan represents vital existence, instead of spiritual pipe dreams.
Life is the greatest indulgence – death, the greatest abstinence. Therefore, make the most of life, here and now!
There is no heaven of glory bright, and no hell where sinners roast. Here and now is our day of torment! Here and now is our day of joy!
Anyone who thinks of Satan as evil should consider all the men, women, children, and animals who have died because it was “God’s will.�? Certainly a person grieving the untimely loss of a loved one would much rather have their loved one with them than in God’s hands! Instead, they are unctuously consoled by their clergyman who says, “It was God’s will, my dear�?; or “He is in God’s hands now, my son.�? Such phrases have been a convenient way for religionists to condone or excuse the mercilessness of God. But if God is in complete control and as benign as he is supposed to be, why does He allow these things to happen?
Pious prophets have taught man to fear Satan. But what of terms like “God fearing�?? If God is so merciful, why do people have to fear him? Are we to believe there is nowhere we can turn to escape fear? If you have to fear God, why not be “Satan fearing�? and at least have the fun that being God fearing denies you? Without such wholesale fear religionists would have had nothing with which to wield power of their followers.
The Satanist, realizing that anything he gets is of his own doing, takes command of the situation instead of praying to God for it to happen. Positive thinking and positive action add up to results.
When a Satanist commits a wrong, he realizes that it is natural to make a mistake – and if he is truly sorry about what he has done, he will learn from it and take care not to do the same thing again. If he is not honestly sorry about what he has done, and knows he will do that same thing over and over, he has no business confessing and asking forgiveness in the first place. But this is exactly what happens. People confess their sins so that they may clear their consciences – and be free to go out and sin again, usually the same sin.
God can do all the things man is forbidden to do – such as kill people, perform miracles to gratify his will, control without apparent responsibility, etc.
Satanism advocates practicing a modified form of the Golden Rule. Our interpretation of this rule is: “Do unto others as they do unto you�?; because if you “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,�? and they, in turn, treat you badly, it goes against human nature to continue to treat them with consideration. You should do unto others as you would have them do unto you, but if your courtesy is not returned, they should be treated with the wrath they deserve.
The Roman god, Lucifer, was the bearer of light, the spirit of the air, the personification of enlightenment.
Satanism encourages any form of sexual expression you may desire, so long as it hurts no one else.
No matter what you’ve been told about the “immaculate conception�? – even if blind faith allows you to swallow this absurdity – you know full well if you are to produce a child, there must be sexual contact with a person of the opposite sex! If you feel guilty for committing the “original sin,�? you certainly will feel even deeper guilt for performing a sex act only for self-gratification, with no intention of creating children.
The Satanist fully realizes why religionists declare masturbation to be sinful. Like all other natural acts people will do it, no matter how severely reprimanded. Causing guilt is an important facet of their malicious scheme to obligate people to atone for “sins�? by paying the mortgages on temples of abstinence!
Every fund raising organization, be it a charitable foundation, community council, religious or fraternal association, etc., carefully selects a person who is adept at making others feel guilty for its chairman or coordinator. It is the job of this chairman to intimidate us into opening first our hearts, and then our wallets.
Religionists have kept their followers in line by suppressing their egos. By making their followers feel inferior, the awesomeness of their god is insured. Satanism encourages its members to develop a good strong ego because it gives them the self respect necessary for a vital existence in this life.
The highest of all holidays in the Satanic religion is the date of one’s own birth. After all, aren’t you happier about the fact that you were born than you are about the birth of someone you have never even met?
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